× "For this reason shall a man leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife" - Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:5

‘’You could get that done by yourself, you know!’’

4 years 3 months ago #3391 by Titolu
Can we get down to some real talk here please?

I don’t know if I should refer to it as an ownership mentality, or just an act of selfishness; but I just get disturbed anytime I see this trend displayed; by both sexes – ladies and guys alike.

I’ve met so many ladies, who are so dependent on others, particularly the opposite sex that it hurts. They don’t ever seem to be able to get anything done on their own, especially where money is concerned.

Some ladies depend on guys before they can do virtually anything, as little as make their hair, paying to see a movie by themselves, eating out, shopping, in fact, virtually before they do anything. It’s like literally handling over the key of their happiness to someone else.

I was exasperated recently when a lady told me she’s been longing to see a movie, but she has to wait till she gets a guy to take her to the cinemas, I was just like, ‘’like seriously?’’

Sometimes ago, my cousin, (a guy) accusing me of not liking his post on instagram some days back, I told him I couldn’t get to see the post because my data subscription expired and I did not re-subscribe till like a week later because I a bit low on cash at the time.

My cousin couldn’t believe that I was ‘falling’ his hand like that; according to him, I wasn’t supposed to lack data in my life…lol. He said ‘correct’ girls were supposed to have guys who would take turns subscribing for them…imagine! That was his belief and he really meant it.

This mentality isn’t limited to ladies alone. Do you know many guys also give that dependent vibes too, its either they pretend as if they cannot, or perhaps they really cannot do any house chore on their own, or even look after themselves. As little as making noodles they are going to eat or cleaning up after themselves….

Some guys keep different ladies for several purposes, and of course, all selfish; one to do their shopping, another to cook for them, one to wash and do laundry, just name it….

One of my friends once complained to me that he is tired of eating bread, that he really needed to get married ASAP so he could have someone that would cook real food for him; and I was like ‘’are you kidding me?’’

Don’t get me wrong, of course a lady should undoubtedly know how to cook and take care of her family, but making that a criterion for marriage is sure wrong.
We need to sit up and learn to take responsibility for our welfare, whether guys or ladies. Let us stop feeling that we are inadequate or incomplete by ourselves till we get some ‘’human messiah’’ to sort us out.

Ladies, men are not our ATM cards; and we sure need to discover the joy of treating ourselves to a night of popcorn and movies; believe me, it’s rewarding.

It is wrong to start a relationship just so we can have someone pay our bills or clean up after us. We should stop being concerned about what we would get from relationships but more with what we can give. Let us quit attaching our happiness to the things we get from others.

We should learn to appreciate people’s help and not take it for granted. If you are blessed with someone who helps pay your bills, see it as a privilege and not a right and be grateful for it.

Let us ask the Lord for the grace to be considerate, selfless and not willing to milk others dry.

Lastly, please do remember, no man can actually make us complete; only God can.

Bless ya’all


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